Thursday, April 19, 2012
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Levon
I don't know what to say. Life's wheel is spinning and so filled with color, light, life, drama, horrors, love, delight, comic strips, headphones, collages, sunburns, Styrofoam cups of vodka, drummers dying, birds cooing, the fan over my head turning, making me feel kind of cool.
It's the third day of the Master Cleanse and I read on Facebook that Levon is fixin to pass. God, I just can't come up with any euphemism that sounds even halfway decent.
What can I say?
It all rolls into one.
Here I am, on the same couch I was on in the last post, most likely still missing a lover, seeing my glass of lemonade blur into the oneness that is impossible to name and yet is all of this. All of this. Nothing.
Levon, I feel selfish that I wanted to come see you and now won't get to. I feel something - but I can't really say what - for your family, your wife, your children.
I can't imagine what it's like to be a wife and have your husband dying, but, then again, I can. It scares me and wrenches my gut, and sometimes I feel that may be why I've avoided such things, but, no. That can't be it either.
That glass on the footstool and the water glass next to it, ultimately devoid of names.
Levon dying.
Other things I saw on Facebook today:
A billboard that says "Either you love bacon or you're wrong."
A 3 year old kidnapped and mother shot and killed.
News that Tom Petty got his guitars back.
A new blue carpet gifted to my friend Shawn for the floor of his Big Red truck home.
Me on the corner with my I LOVE YOU sign and a guy from Tel Aviv taking a photo with me to email to his wife. He's going back home in a few days, and this is the first time he's traveled back to Austin without her.
He had black eyebrows and one of them had a white patch in it.
Also today I saw Luke Wilson, I'm pretty sure. We both had our sunglasses on.
The world turns, so they tell me.
Levon, I don't know what to say.
I'm rambling to ramble. Meandering here and there, can't find any words to claim anything true or specific.
I love you.
* * * * *
Post Script:
Some cheerful news that deserves its own photo (maybe I'll get around to it . . . ) -
The plant in the post below - Mr. Tambourine Plant - that went into the back yard, possibly to die, has revived! I cut it back once it was out there for a few days, and, lo and behold, it's growing new leaves and has moved back into the bedroom. Life!
It's the third day of the Master Cleanse and I read on Facebook that Levon is fixin to pass. God, I just can't come up with any euphemism that sounds even halfway decent.
What can I say?
It all rolls into one.
Here I am, on the same couch I was on in the last post, most likely still missing a lover, seeing my glass of lemonade blur into the oneness that is impossible to name and yet is all of this. All of this. Nothing.
Levon, I feel selfish that I wanted to come see you and now won't get to. I feel something - but I can't really say what - for your family, your wife, your children.
I can't imagine what it's like to be a wife and have your husband dying, but, then again, I can. It scares me and wrenches my gut, and sometimes I feel that may be why I've avoided such things, but, no. That can't be it either.
That glass on the footstool and the water glass next to it, ultimately devoid of names.
Levon dying.
Other things I saw on Facebook today:
A billboard that says "Either you love bacon or you're wrong."
A 3 year old kidnapped and mother shot and killed.
News that Tom Petty got his guitars back.
A new blue carpet gifted to my friend Shawn for the floor of his Big Red truck home.
Me on the corner with my I LOVE YOU sign and a guy from Tel Aviv taking a photo with me to email to his wife. He's going back home in a few days, and this is the first time he's traveled back to Austin without her.
He had black eyebrows and one of them had a white patch in it.
Also today I saw Luke Wilson, I'm pretty sure. We both had our sunglasses on.
The world turns, so they tell me.
Levon, I don't know what to say.
I'm rambling to ramble. Meandering here and there, can't find any words to claim anything true or specific.
I love you.
* * * * *
Post Script:
Some cheerful news that deserves its own photo (maybe I'll get around to it . . . ) -
The plant in the post below - Mr. Tambourine Plant - that went into the back yard, possibly to die, has revived! I cut it back once it was out there for a few days, and, lo and behold, it's growing new leaves and has moved back into the bedroom. Life!
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